"If you are married to or a partner of someone with a chronic illness and/or a long-term disability, then you are a spousal caregiver / Well Spouse. It requires no specific degree of illness. If your life is impacted by the health of, or by the care provided to your partner you are a Well Spouse.
Behind that simple definition lies a whole world of experiences that no other family caregiver has – and there are over 7 million current and former spousal caregivers in the U.S. alone who can attest to that."
This quote from the article of the same name answers the question, "Who is a Spousal Caregiver." For each couple it's an answer personal to the well partner -- and relative to how the couple's relationship was before the illness -- the elephant in the room -- arrived. There is no way to compare one's own caregiving with someone else's -- it is what it is.